Things I've been thinking about lately

This blog entry comes to you in three parts.

And this is a picture of a duck (a duck that I walk past every day, a duck that knows secrets & can see through your soul).

ONE:

So, lately, I've been focusing a lot on my faults. And I mean that in a good way. If there is one. Anyway, these are the ones I've identified:

•I'm judgmental: too hard on myself & others
•I'm quick to anger: often taking out the frustration I feel for myself and my own faults on others I love ...often taking offense, small comments too seriously
•I'm impatient: I want things done when I want them done. Usually before they actually get done...

All of this boils down to the fact that I'm a perfectionist. I always have been I'm also me, which is awesome.

"You know what? You're an individual, and that makes people nervous. And it's gonna keep making people nervous for the rest of your life." -Louise Fitzhugh, Harriet the Spy

TWO:

I've been thinking about religion. We were going to go to church this weekend, but we slept in...

I like thisThis American Life story about a "bad Christian". I relate to it a lot.

I'm wearing the cross necklace I got at Trinity College in Dublin. It's Presbyterian. I consider myself pretty Presbyterian. I'm a Calvinist at least. Those five points have always made sense to me. They're something I hold on to.

But, I also believe in Bravery. Compassion. Love. Those things - as always - win out.

It's a process.

“I think it pisses God off if you walk by the color purple in a field somewhere and don't notice it.” -Alice Walker, The Color Purple

THREE:

Education. Continuing it rather. My new job comes with the benefit of a tuition break, and I like the idea of school. I like the idea of challenging myself.

I spent last week and the beginning of this week talking to a lot of the best and brightest of the class of 2013.

Obviously, it's made me feel like an underperforming loser. It's made me feel a distinct lack of focus.

But I could do something. I'd like to apply for a creative writing program. I think. The one here is competitive. But I might try for it. Applications due in January.

Or I could just apply as a post-baccalaureate student and take some classes for fun. I've searched through the course catalog and so far, I'm interested in classes like Hebrew, Fashion Trend Analysis, Gender and Communication, The American Novel, Intro to Animal Sciences. See what I mean by a lack of focus?

And on that note, I don't really know what to say next. If you have any suggestions or advice, please leave them in the comments.

“Education: the path from cocky ignorance to miserable uncertainty.” -Mark Twain